By Robin Elander
- Don’t try to go to every holiday party or event. You know you don’t want to anyway. Make a plan to connect with the people who you really want to connect with whether it’s over the holidays or after and plan to spend quality time. Pick a party or two to go to and enjoy them, but don’t try to go to each one that you are invited.
- Allow yourself to slow down to reflect on the year focusing on what went well. Reflect with gratitude for all that you were able to accomplish, how you grew as a person and who helped you along the way.
- Reflect briefly on what didn’t work so you can tweak things for the following year, but don’t get down on yourself, you took a risk to try whatever you did, and that is huge in itself and you have learned in the process!
4.If you’re getting overwhelmed on end-of-year tasks and starting to think about New Year goals, write a list of your “to dos,” to get them all out of your head, then take a moment to breathe or walk around the block, then start to prioritize your list by coming up with a codes like “M” for Monday, T for Tuesday, NW for next week, continue with … by the end of January, February, end of six months, end of 2019, and beyond and another list of who you will hire or ask for help to do the things, a “maybe if time allows list” and another list for what you are NOT going to do.
This will help you get a REAL handle on priorities and give you clear marching orders for the day and days ahead. This is something I have become a master at over time and love to help people with.
Don’t try to do everything in the last two weeks of the year or in the first two weeks of the year. Progress and impact are a beautiful slow burn over time.
Also, if you’re not getting invited to holiday gatherings, don’t fret. That was me. Cultivating connections and friendships is a lifelong process and it’s not always easy. When I first moved to Raleigh, then Ventura, then later Santa Barbara I didn’t know anyone and had to actively try to meet people. Believe it or not, I used to be cripplingly shy so this wasn’t easy, and I still have tendencies to hide in the crowd on occasion. Putting on events and programs has helped me open up and connect because I have a “role” and a purpose to make the invitation. If this resonates with you, can you find yourself a role that makes this process easier for you little by little?
- Learning to be comfortable in your own skin is also a lifelong process. Don’t get down on yourself if you find that you are ever lonely especially around the holidays. Be kind to yourself and explore with curiosity the possibilities to grow in self-love and all of the possibilities of life. One of the many ways I cultivated comfort in my own skin,definitely a lifelong process for me, was through traveling solo all over the world for about two years 2011 to 2013. In case you think this was easy, I had to save and plan for seven years to be able to do it and I was scared to death to go. Best thing I’ve ever done.
- Lastly if you don’t have gifts or time to shop for people you feel the desire or need to shop for, don’t fret. Tell them you love and care about them and really would rather spend quality time with them instead of frantically shopping for gifts OR … that you want to plan to do something special with them after the holidays when things aren’t so nuts.
- Give yourself a pass on all the guilt this time of year peeps. I bet you’re actually rocking it!
Send me a note or comment if you’ve found this helpful and what resonates with you. Email me at [email protected]
Robin Elander is director of Global Good Impact, www.globalgoodimpact.com, a company she launched dedicated to building strong individuals and communities around the world. She has more than 15 years of experience planning hundreds of projects, initiatives and events. She enjoys working with individuals and organizations to make positive and impacts in their lives and communities and coaching people how to overcome fears, obstacles and plan out the lives of their dreams. Elander is a yoga instructor, health and wellness coach and lover of all things outdoors. She is executive director of the Santa Barbara Summer Solstice Celebration, one of the largest parades and festivals on the West Coast.